Bleeding Vs and Football Practice

We are at school this year more than ever before, and I realized I hadn't really talked to the guys about the white boxes in the shared bathrooms. So, I proceed to tell them on the way home from school, describing menstruation, purposes of menstruation, dangers of touching the "white box", etcetera, etcetera. Evan is my explorer. The places his hands have been scare me. I asked Ian if he got it, and he explained to me that he already knew all about this stuff...I told him when he was six. Evan was playing Angry Birds in the backseat and looked at me like I was lying to him. I actually love that I don't get freaked out about this kind of thing, but hopefully they aren't at football practice thinking about bleeding vaginas. Just saying.

S or 8

Evan said, "When I write my S, I get carried away and write an 8." So cute!

How Hair Grows

Evan says to me yesterday, "Mom, I know how to make your hair grow. If you have a brain freeze and stick your head in the sun, it grows. I just did it and felt my hair grow."

He comes up with the silliest stuff. Those green eyes melt my heart.

October 22

I remember the first time I saw you. We had waited for so long to meet you. Your daddy had a most amazing look on his face. He was so proud of you! You were lying next to your mommy with her arm tucked around you.She looked perfect. You made her a mommy and her face was filled with peace. I was amazed. Simply amazed by you and by them. Of course, I had felt an intense love towards the babies I had given birth to, so it struck me that I could feel such an intense love towards someone I had never met before. You captured my heart with your sweet little face, your dimpled chin, and your head of black hair just like your mommy's. I wanted to hold you forever. When I was driving back to the hospital that morning when the sun came up, a morning very similar to this morning, I was struck by how new the world felt to me. It was a gorgeous first day to be alive. The leaves were turning, the sky was blue. The contrast in colors was simply beautiful. And, there was a place in my heart that was new and beautiful to me as well. I had no idea how much I would love you, but you my precious little grandson, have stolen my heart. As I sit here, with tears running down my face, the memories of one year are filling my heart. I love that you love me unconditionally. I love that when you see me you smile so very very big. I love that you want me to hold you. I love watching you walk, talk, laugh, squeal, and ask me for bites by smacking your cute little lips. I love that you trust me. I love that you laugh at me. Watching how safe you are fills my heart. Your parents are amazing. Watching them love you and take care of you brings such peace to my heart. You are blessed beyond measure to have been born their son. I am thankful you are safe. My Sweet Little Finny, please always remember that you are loved by your mommy and daddy, your grandmas and grandpas, your aunties and uncles, and that God has a purpose and a plan for your life that He put in place before you were even made. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Every precious part of you. I can't wait to share more time with you and create more memories with you. I love you bigger than the world, Gamma

What I Do All Day Part 2

I kiss my little guys. I watch all of my children because watching them is an amazing thing to do. I watch them play in their games and practices, interact with each other, be silent, be LOUD, just be. I hold the little ones and am privileged enough to be confided in by the older ones. I hopefully respect and love my husband enough for him to notice. I take joy in their accomplishments. I am amazed by my grandson and just pick him up and maul him randomly. I correct and hopefully direct my children. Sometimes I fail at this and sometimes I succeed. I lose my patience and have tons of patience. I love having my amazing home and taking care of it. I feel overwhelmed by how much work it takes some days. I am honored and humbled to have a husband who cares for all of us...financially and emotionally. There are very few days I am not struck by his consistency when he gets up before dawn. I am honored and humbled that he and I are on the same page with his job and my job. I make a lot of mistakes with the people I love. I am hopefully humble enough to admit them and ask for forgiveness. I pray I honor my God, my family, my friends. I pray I am a blessing to those around me because I am beyond blessed by them. My days are full. My days may look the same with little things thrown in here and there. But, I cannot imagine doing anything else right now. It is real. It counts. It is my life. And I will count my blessings in the midst of the busy.

What I Do All Day

Someone asked me what I do all day long...I am a stay-at-home mom you know. My life is a cake walk apparently. It stung. It cut, I have to admit. But, I decided to look at what I do all day long, to take note of it. So here is my day...just today until 6:00 p.m.

Wake up
Text a discouraged friend.
Stumble to get coffee.
Laundry...
Make sure the boys are ready for the day which requires multiple attempts.
Laundry...
Set them up for school.
Wash bedding...
Teach them how to read, write, math, science, social studies, art, etc. etc.
Finally get myself ready for the day, but the legs will have to wait for another day.
Say for the millionth time...and I am not exaggerating...Don't bounce the ball in the house!
Finn comes to visit while daddy goes to school and mommy goes to work.
Run to the bookstore across town to get Amanda her book for Honors English that no one in town seemed to carry except a small used book store...clear across town.
Run to the grocery store to get spaghetti sauce for dinner.
Run to my friends house to drop off some things I borrowed a month ago.
Run the book to Amanda.
Run home to finish up school with the boys.
Make a lasagna for dinner.
Run Amanda her soccer shirt she forgot...yes, I am aware I probably shouldn't have done that if I am teaching her responsibility.
Run to Evan's soccer practice.
Run home to get Lindsey.
Run to Amanda's soccer game while dropping Ian off at football practice which requires getting tons of gear found and ready.
Get home to throw dinner in the oven.
Laundry...
Get a call about something I have to do tomorrow.
Sit down to send Ryan a paper for school that is on my computer.
Answer a few important emails.
Which leads me to this....

I have no idea what I do with my time. I guess I should get a job that brings in money so that I can do something important with my life.

or not...

9/11/2011

"History is a tool for the living."

I heard this last night on a 9/11 special. It will go in my "favorite quotes" book. It stirred me, made me stop for a moment. My heart was broken in a new way watching it all happen again last night. Hearing the voices of those lost...and some who were saved. Seeing the pictures of things that are way too hard to grasp on a television screen. I didn't know if I could make it through it was so heartbreaking. But, I am thankful my heart feels broken over something so horrible. I am thankful I have not become immune to human suffering.

I don't think 10 years ago I even began to grasp what was happening. I had no idea what the twin towers even were. I had no idea how to feel when we were the ones actually being hurt. It felt fiction.

I hope I grasp it a little more today. Not to become angry, miserable, or fearful but I just don't want to take what we have for granted. I don't want to forget how blessed we are and how quickly that can change. I don't want to forget that the human race is good, caring, sacrificing, and loving even if there are some who don't fit into that category. I don't want to forget our history.